I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I haven't been this sober since birth.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Randomize