I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Randomize
