I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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