when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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