hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
