I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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