He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Randomize
