I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
