I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
