i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Randomize
