she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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