i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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