My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
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