That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Randomize
