She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Randomize
