I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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