im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize