ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I wannas sexs uuuuu
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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