i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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