i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
