oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
