So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
