try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
