He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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