Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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