I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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