Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Randomize
