just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
Randomize