Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
