I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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