btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
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