But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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