Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
