big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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