So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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