Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
