can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
He did a backflip because drugs
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