How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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