everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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