we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
