I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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