i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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