I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Will exercising make me less horny?
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
