Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
