just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize