Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
did you just send me my own nude
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
