You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
