Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
