fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Randomize
