omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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